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A Handicapped Bitch in Recovery!

Tuesday, January 11, 2005

Bitching out - The year of the fall

HOW CAN ONE GUY TURN FROM THIS...

TO THIS!:

yes... that´s still me
IN JUST ONE YEAR

2004 was one of the crappiest years I had to live throw.

I started last year trying to survive to one of this-close-to-get-divorced situations, with a wonderfull trip to the IGUAZU FALLS with my Israel ANGELS, who helped me so much to get trough all my those days shit. And it was terrific! we had so much fun togheter that I almost forgot my husband´s name... (THAT´S WHAT FRIENDS ARE FOR!) so, that was the beginning... let´s say 2004 started well.

We finally got back togheter... we had our home storms, but we worked them out and now everything is ok on our relationship, and I´M REALLY HAPPY ABOUT IT! (despite being the everyweek " desperate housewives" inspiration, hhehe).

In april I decided to go back to college, and I started studying again a new carrer, and it felt great! to be back in the ailes with books in my hands... i loved it. (by that time I had lots of finnantial problems related with my former work, so this desition was a real hard-to-be-taken one ´cause, as you may know, private universities are not cheap... and I couln´t think in going back to suffer all the burocracy and shitty issues of the argentinian public education again.) Untill this point, year went well.
May started with a new office job, I had my classes, new college friends and everything was ok. then, another great thing happened, I did some auditions (after a long time without performing) an I got the part for a new musical production. (maybe the most of you don´t know that i´m a singer/actor). I was incredibly happy to be on stage again!. So I started rehearsing lots of hours per week. Untill this point, year went well.
And then...
I woke up some may morning.. and I felt something strange on my left arm... "it´s nothing" I thought, "it´s just some bad move I did on last night rehearsal"... when that feeling came across my left leg and left side of my face I almost pee on my pants and run to the hospital.
After a thousand tests they discover a SPOT on my brain. It wasn´t a tumor or somthing like that, but I had a SPOT on my brain.
So
  • the spot happened to be a brain injure caused by...... nobody knows it yet.
  • what had started as a strange feeling on my left side became afterwards an almost total paralysis of the whole body.
  • I lost my sight several times (now I have doble-sight)
  • I´m not walking without help...
  • doctors can´t get to a diagnosys yet, it´s a very rare case... (stop bitching it´s not their fault)
  • I started a drug treathment and I´m better now. I can write! (cortizone ... )

ok, I don´t really wanna fall into details about all the things I had to face since this fucking illness came up in my life, and I don´t wanna sound like a DANIELLE STEEL novel but, if I am writting this, is because I feel it could help somebody, to make someone thik about life, about little things.

We are all running our lives, rearching for thigs, especting things, trying to own things, trying to get things, tryin to win thing, trying to fuck things, tryimng to earn things, trying to love tings...

I thought I had them all... I thougt I had everythig, and now I need someone to help me to go to the bathoom...

BUT LET ME TELL U, this won´t stop me. Since I had to quit the play, colllege and of course, my job, I

  • wrote a novel (wich became very popular in lat america -more than 4.000readers!)
  • participate in the production of a teathre show.
  • am writting a new musical script.
  • started writtng this blog, and I enjoy it a lot!.
  • am helping in a new script adaptation of a classic greek tragedy.
  • started a new distance curse on turism.
  • am taking care of chleo, my daughter.
  • started to enjoy litttle things.
  • love... i just love...

I know there are a thousand things that I just skip... but they will come up in the upcoming posts. Be free to ask whatever u like, It´s ok. NOW A NEW YEAR HAS STARTED... AD EVERYTHING WILL BE FINE. FOR ALL OF US.

I hope I didn´t bored you... if so, just bitch me by email...I´d love to read that hhehe.

I ´m a little sleepy now... see you next time!

IAN

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